As a person, as an author, I have found many truths to be self evident and I came up with these two short lists:
As a person
1. Jeans are made of cotton. They can wrinkle. Unless they are coming straight out of the dryer OR you’re wearing them so tight ironing won’t make a difference, they need to be ironed. Same can be said for t-shirts.
2. Children only need to speak with you the second you get on the phone. It’s a statistical fact.
3. There is always someone doing 5 miles less than the speed limit driving in the fast lane…who refuses to move…no matter what.
4. If you wear a white shirt or pants, food will somehow end up on you…even if you’re not the one eating it.
As an author
1. Not everyone will like your book. Accept it now and don’t get any piece of clothing tied in a knot when you receive unfavourable review.
2. Not everyone is supposed to like your book. Art is subjective.
3. Adjectives are part of life, part of the literary world, embrace them (up to a point).
4. No matter how good the writing, at the end of the day, the thing that matters most is the story.
5. True success isn’t instant, it’s earned.
6. Staying published is about talent and perseverance, not luck.
7. If you follow trends, you’ll always be behind.
8. If your characters never become real to you, you’re not a writer.
What about you? What truths have you found to be self-evident? Comment to enter to win 2 books from Monday’s list of books for The Season’s One Year Anniversary Giveaway.
**Must be a resident of the continental United States
these 2 truths I have found visit me in my life-
1. If you sweat the small stuff, you just end up with small sweaty stuff.
2. If you read a really good paperback and have only 2 chapters to read to see who the villian is, your Jack Russell terrier will grab the book, run with it, and proceed to tear it to shreds! (I can’t tell you how many trips to the book store I have taken just to read the last couple of chapters of books Willie has torn to shreds)
I love this made me smile! I love white now worn it for years since I have kids and they eat and wipe thier hands on good ole mom!
Here are 20 of my favorites….not in any particular favorite order but words to live by!
1. Some people’s daily mission is to annoy you….
2. All things get better with age: wine, cheese and Johnny Depp (or insert your own favorite hero).
3. Eight catnaps a day is a good thing
4. Chaos — It’s not just a lifestyle, it’s a state of mind
5. Speak your mind, but ride a fast horse!
6. Eat dessert FIRST!!
7. Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.
8. Experience is when I make a mistake, I recognize that I made it before.
9. No matter what anyone says: Life is not a wheel and I am not a hampster.
10. Hide your cookies at the bottom of the freezer (like any cookie could hide from me :snort)
11. If high heels were so wonderful, men would still be wearing them!
12. I have an hour glass figure….but most of the sand is in the bottom!
13. Start every day off with a smile and get it over with!
14. I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process…. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance?
15. I’m not really a bitch. I just play one in your life.
16. If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is to stop digging.
17. All men are animals…some just make better pets!
18. Life is short, read fast!
19. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I’m pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
20. Screw making lemonade when life throws you lemons. H**l, make margaritas!
The blog made me chuckle. Your truth about the white clothes reminded me of something Candice Hern wrote about her adventures of wearing a white blazer while on a 3 state, multi-author bus tour a few years ago. She said for her, wearing white anything is a magnet for a food spill. She wondered how long she could wear that jacket without spilling something on it!
Karen,
Who was tragically smushed under a case of books
Nobody can write your story but you.
There is no “great idea” or “fabulous first three chapters” section in any bookstore.
Here are some truths i have found:
1) The moment you buy gas it will go down in price.
2) The moment you think a bunny hasn’t had gas in awhile the next day one will end up with it.
3) The night you leave your window down in the car it will rain.
4) Your bust your butt of in college to obtain a degree only to go into a different field.
5) The phone is always missing when your expecting an important call.
6) Crisis’s like to come in pairs and sometimes duo’s.
7) The moment you find yourself liking a guy he shall revel he has a girlfriend.
8) Someone will always try to outbid you at the last second on ebay.
9) The moment you get a job your parents start hitting you up for money(even if you haven’t started it yet).
10) Saving an expensive piece of chocolate for a special moment always makes the chocolate staler.
11) Willy Wonka night will always cure the blues.
12) You don’t actually start liking your siblings till your all adults.
13) There is always someone smarter than you in the room.
14) The golden retriever shall always interrupt the movie/tv show because she doesn’t like you’re not paying attention to her.
15) DVR’s are a god send when you have a golden retriever.
16) You shall avoid being burned when roasting marshmallows , but instead burn yourself on the light turning it off.
17) You can never have too many bookshelves.
18) Bunnies shall always take 20% of your paycheck in buying them food.
19) Bunnies can high maintenance animals.
20) The beagle shall always find every hole in the fence.
21) The dog shall have to pee the moment you get comfortable in bed.
22) You shall always get to a cliff hanger or good part in a book the moment it’s time for you to go to sleep or do something.
As soon as you get all your dish’s washed someone is hungry again.
The one best thing I have found is your dog will always love you no mater what!! He knows when you need that extra doggie kiss . Also don’t let the little things in life bug you, it just isn’t worth it.
haha i love this! it is so true. I can never wear white… on my wedding day i may need to wear red or something cause i will spill something on it.
one thing i find is that the book is always better then the movie.
and once you buy that expensive dress that you look great in, it will go on sale shortly after.
Two things:
Money can’t buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
I agree with the white, I have banned it from my closet because no matter how hard I’ve tried, I’ve never been able to keep it clean.
If you buy something in a size too small hoping to lose weight, you’ll have a closet full of tight clothes.
As soon as you mop the floor, someone will walk in with dirty shoes.
If you are running late, there will be someone who is driving like a turtle in front of you.
If you make a shopping list, most of the time you will forget to buy something on the list.
On a good hair day, it will be windy or you will get caught in a rainstorm.
As a granna I have found that few words were needed when dealing with my boys when they were teenagers and now with my grandchildren who are toddlers. Because I found they worked so well I’m passing them on to all of you mothers out there to use!
1. It doesn’t matter if you like me becuase I’ll always love you.
2. No is a one word answer.
3. “Because I said so” is the end of the conversation.
Now if it just worked on my husband of 40 years!
Ladies, I’m sooooo lovin’ these truths!! You guys have me totally agreeing and crackin’ up!
It has been so much fun to read all of these! Here are a few self-truths that I have discovered:
1. Hair that takes 30 minutes to straighten will re-curl after 2 minutes in Georgia heat and humidity.
2. I’m allergic to food. Every time I eat, it breaks out into fat.
3. Clothes in my closet that require ironing don’t get worn much.
4. One of the greatest pleasures in life is taking my bra and shoes off at the end of the day.
I will expand on two of yours.
For personal: A child will resort to what he or she thinks is a clever way around the rule of not speaking to you while you are on a phone. They will write whatever they deem as their current emergency on a piece of paper and hold it in front of your face.
For author: Never, never, never, Ever… Did I say never?… Ever contact a reviewer who gives an unfavorable review of your book and explain to them why they just don’t “get it”. Reviewers like to share these emails with everyone they know.
1. If I don’t use top coat, my nail polish will chip.
2. If chocolate is in the house, I’m going to eat it.
3. I feel more energized and happy when the sun is out.
4. I write, therefore I AM a writer.
5. If I procrastinate, I won’t finish my WIP.
There are quite a few things I’ve discovered…
1. I shouldn’t sacrifice myself to help others.
2. There are way more grumpy people in the world than happy ones.
3. When you have a pet you don’t need children, since you spend just as much money raising your pet as you do a child.
4. Never say…”What else can go wrong?” or you’ll soon find out.
Haha! These are so funny. Karen H…I once told someone your #15 and I swear your #19 is on point.
1. Loving yourself is the most important thing ever…more than your husband, more than your kids, more than your family. The moment you forget that you will run yourself in the ground.
2. The moment you put away your last bit of folded laundry, you will have more dirty clothes to wash.
3. If you are not about squat (nice way of saying what I’m thinking), then I’m not about you.
4. It’s not about the outfit it’s about the shoes.
5. It’s not about the labels, it’s about being clean and pressed.
6. The moment you try to do something for yourself everyone wants you to do something for you.
7. No matter what people say, books ARE investments. Hell, anything that makes you smile is an investment.
8. I have to be my own cheerleader.
9. If you don’t believe in your story nobody else will.
10. Writing a page a day brings you closer to your end.
11. I am a writer! I am a writer! I am a writer!
12. Peace and quietness are inside of you…you just have to tap into it.
13. The moment you cut your hair, you will want it to be long again.
14. Men are an evil necessity.
1. Cleaning your house while your children are growing is like shoveling your walk while its still snowing.
2. You can’t wait for the storm to be over, you have to learn to dance in the rain.
3. I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody (Bill Cosby)
4. One rule I observed. I never took a drink until my day’s work of writing a thousand words was done (Jack London)
5. The difference between fact and fiction? Fiction has to make sense (Tom Clancy)
6. Mommy’s bubble bath should not be interrupted unless someone is bleeding or on fire.
1. Don’t ask a question if you’re not prepared to hear an answer that you won’t like
2. Being honest doesn’t mean you have to be cruel. There’s (almost) always a nice way to phrase something.
3. Smile. People notice and appreciate it even if you don’t think they do.
4. Fairy tales do come true. They just take a little more work than you thought they would when you were little 🙂
What can go wrong, will.
If you plant a garden, the deer will come.
Making me smile on a writing cave day. Snuck out to check on TheSeason. Don’t tell my CP !!
1. My father always said “Your rights end where the other guy’s nose begins.”
2. He also said : “If they pay your for 8 hours, work for 8 hours. Anything less is stealing.
3. On writing : If you have written an entire book, no matter what happens with it, give yourself some credit. Do you know how many people have said they wanted to write a book and haven’t?
4. If this writing gig was easy, everyone would be doing it.
5. Nothing is permanent. Not taxes, not first drafts, not even death. So ease up on yourself and just write!
6. When touring Eastern Europe, don’t ask if a hotel has hot water. Ask IF and WHEN they turn it on.
7. The longer I have to dawdle over it, the thicker my makeup gets. Give me an hour and I look like Tammy Faye Baker. Give me two and I look like Gene Simmons. The same thing goes for manuscripts. Keep fiddling with it long after you should have typed The End and submitted it and it will either make editors and agents laugh their butts off or scare the dust out of them. NOT the response you are looking for!
8. A tough critique partner who refuses to softball her critiques and always gives it to you straight is worth her weight in gold. Trust me!
9. If you rewrite your novel to suit every critique or contest judge who ever looks at it you will have a book that sounds like it has been written by committee. Nobody buys books from committees.
10. Life is not fair. If you want fair, play baseball. Life is only as fair as you work to make it.
Bonus : Success is the very BEST revenge.
If you have an early wake-up call, you will have trouble sleeping.
These are great and I’m living proof today of the “white clothes” truth! 🙂
Here are mine:
1. You can never win if you always take yourself out of the game.
2. No piece of writing will ever be perfect, but if we follow our hearts and stay true to our own voices, we can make it perfectly wonderful.
What goes around, comes around.
Things aren’t always what they seem.
My number one truth is NEVER SAY NEVER – it always comes back and bites you.
and
men are from venus and women from mars or is it the other way around lol.
I have noticed:
If there is a ball in motion, that ball will somehow find it’s way to Smack me when I’m ot looking. Even thoug I won’t be playing & it may not be near me, & the game may be over.
if I decide to be lazy & look like a bum I Wil see someone I haven’t seen in forever & he/she Will look good.
If I leave my phone unattended I will miss a call from someone I wanted to hear from.
if I don’t have a book in my purse I Will end up waiting somewhere unexpectedly for a long time.
when I want the kids to nap, they won’t be tired, & if I need them wide awake they will fall asleep.
no matter how much I plan or how far in advance, life happens so it’s better to be flexible.
1. The minute you decide to go on a diet, you are hungry.
2. Treat everyone the way you would like to be treated.
3. Give the other person some slack, you don’t know what is going on in their life.
4. There are some children who are obnoxious and they usually have parents who think they are the cutest things on earth.
5. A relationship takes work from both parties.
6. Nothing is sweeter than a tiny baby snuggled up in your arms.
7. Dance in a warm summer rain, it will nourish the spirit.
8. Take only pictures, leave only footprints.
9. Love your Family and make sure they know it.
@librarypat *sniff, sniff, sniff* That was so good. Especially 8
1. Do not sweat the small stuff because there is always something bigger coming your way.
2. Enjoy moments and let good memories help you during bad times.
1. The minute my head hits the pillow to take a nap in the daytime the phone rings.
2. Someone will always give me a box of chocolates when I’m on a diet.
3. Even with a room full of toys my grandkids will fight over the same one.
4. The one time you go out with no makeup on you will run into everyone you know.
5. When drawing names for Secret Santa you will always get the one person you don’t like or don’t know.
6. The minute you wash your car it’s going to rain.
Great lists.
Even though you are the center of your universe, it’s not all about you.
Not everyone you meet will like you so just smile and go forward.
No argument should contain the words “always” and “never” if you want the other person to listen to what you have to say.
If you’re trying to be sure to get somewhere important on time or early and manage to leave the house with plenty of time to spare, there will be horrible traffic
A kiss on the nose or cuddle from the puppy dog (or cat or other such pet) will bring a smile no matter what
When PMS strikes and cravings are strong and you absolutely must have chocolate, salty popcorn or what ever your weakness is, there will be absolutely nothing remotely close in cupboard
These truths are self-evident:
1. I like being a dreamer, I hope I never lose that ability.
2. Laughing is good for the soul.
3. Starbucks free refills are the best thing since sliced bread.
4. Children are the sweetest & most honest human beings.
5. I can never have enough romance novels.
1. The only thing that matters is how you think of your life and not what others think.
2. No matter how many times you say the work “no” to a 3 year old they just don’t learn it.
3. When I get a great scene in my head I’m either driving or not able to write it down.
4. No matter how many times you go to Wal-mart you still can never find anything.
5. When you feel like dying, children will turn into monsters.
6. Just because I hear voices in my head doesn’t make me crazy its just the characters in my head wanting their story told.
I’m adding in another small one:
It’s a universally known truth among women that men can be idiots of the largest kind.
I say this because my father just tripped going down the steps and then proceeded to pass out in the downstairs bathroom. Rather than go to the hospital for extreme dizziness and swollen elbow; he’s just going to work it off….
wow..some of you guys mase great list. The one thing I can think for me is:
When you late to something, it seems like everything is going wrong too.
These are wonderful! I only have one.
Failure doesn’t stop you from succeeding but never making the attempt will.
So many truth’s here, love them. When you need your cell phone the most you want have a charge in it or you will be without service!
If I plant tomatos the ground hogs will eat them.
Murphy’s Law if it can go wrong it will, at least for me.
Your household appliences will start all going out at the same time. Microwave, refrig, clother dryer,
@Quilt Lady My appliances will start going out on me the day after the warranty on it has expired.
My 2 truths that I’ve learned for myself the hard way:
Never say you’ll never do something, because you’d be surprised what you’ll do when you have to!
And don’t try to change people, accept them as they are or move on!
1 truth as a person.) There will always be that one person who just DOESN’T get it.
1 truth as an ‘aspiring’ author.) The longer it sits, the further it sinks . Ideas are like leaves in the wind, some good, some bad, and you’ve got to grab hold of one and never let up or the breeze will carry a potentially amazing idea right from your grasp. (keyword: persistence)
My cats share their house with me.
A good book is never far away.
You can never have too many books.
If I am reading a book my cats will always sit on it and read with me.
Great post today.
1. Don’t fret over things you can’t control.
2. You’ll sleep better if you write a short “to do” list for the next day before bed.
So many of these posts were so funny. Here are a couple I have:
Bad truth:
I find that lightbulbs always burn out in the middle of the night.
Good truth:
If today was a bad day look forward to tomorrow. Tomorrow will be a better day.
“20) The beagle shall always find every hole in the fence.
21) The dog shall have to pee the moment you get comfortable in bed.”
Hehehe, yes! Ginger, my yellow-lab-whose-mom-was-a-beagle, is an escape artist! And she always wants to go out at the most inconvenient times. ^_^
My truths:
Trends come and go, classics stay.
New jewelry trumps new clothes, especially if said jewelry is handmade.
I will never have enough bookshelves.
Leaving the dogs inside when you go out means returning to a fur-covered seat.
The best gifts are not bought with money but are made with love.
why is your fav tv show interpeted with a emerygeny test
One of my truths:
Your adult children can hold responsible jobs, be on the Dean’s List in college but when they walk through that front door they are helpless.
1. The minute you step into the tub to take your own bath, your kid will want your attention.
2. The minute you form an opinion about something, your kid will take the opposite view.
3. The minute you take an interest in your kid’s show and ask a question, your kid sees you as ancient.
4. The minute you click on your favorite radio station on the car radio, your kid will groan for you to change it. *smiles*
5. Always say “maybe” to something because once you say “promise” your kid will never forget and will continue to pester you until they have their way.
LOL LOL Karen in NH, that is so funny and true about Johnny Depp. I swear he’s found the Fountain of Youth.
Raising my kids always made it a definite that either trying to use the bathroom and/or phone guaranteed their undivided attention.
Just as you lay your head down to sleep and finally start drifting off, one of the babies will wake up. 🙂
No matter how many people are at the checkout it seems the minute I’m up they either change cashiers or there is a problem with register. Always happens.
This was so enjoyable to read everyone’s responses.
Carol L.
Lucky4750@aol.com