{"id":6335,"date":"2011-04-05T08:05:02","date_gmt":"2011-04-05T12:05:02","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/theseasonforromance.com\/wordpress\/?p=6335"},"modified":"2011-04-05T08:05:02","modified_gmt":"2011-04-05T12:05:02","slug":"a-virgin-at-her-age","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/smittenbybooks.com\/blog\/2011\/04\/05\/a-virgin-at-her-age\/","title":{"rendered":"A virgin&#8230;at her age?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong><span style=\"color: #008000; font-size: 18px;\">How realistic is the contemporary virgin? <\/span><br \/>\n<\/strong>by <strong>Kat Latham<br \/>\n<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>When I started reading romance *mumble mumble* years (okay, decades) ago, it was nearly impossible to find a heroine who\u2019d had sex before meeting the hero. While this is completely understandable and realistic in historical romance, it\u2019s always seemed curious to me that contemporary adult women were virgins.<\/p>\n<p>Most of them not just virgins but about as inexperienced as I was at 14. (That is, not experienced at all).<\/p>\n<p>As a teenager, I enjoyed reading about women who were a decade older but just as inexperienced as me. Considering I went to a religious high school, I knew sex would remain a vicarious experience for many years, and I\u2019d probably end up like those heroines. Watching their long wait pay off with a hot man made me happy not to experiment with fumbling teenage boys.<\/p>\n<p>I was also surrounded by messages from other forms of media telling me it wasn\u2019t normal for teenagers to be virgins. TV, music, films\u2014they all made me feel my friends and I were strange, while romance novels encouraged me that good things come to those who wait.<\/p>\n<p>A couple of decades later, readers tend to complain when an adult heroine is a virgin. It seems unrealistic. Or perhaps it\u2019s offensive to subject heroines to centuries-old double standards that real-life women are finally shattering.<\/p>\n<p>But how realistic are contemporary adult virgins? According to the U.S. <a href=\"http:\/\/www.cdc.gov\/HealthyYouth\/yrbs\/pdf\/us_sexual_trend_yrbs.pdf\">national Youth Risk Behavior Survey in 2009,<\/a> 46% of 9<sup>th<\/sup>-12<sup>th<\/sup> graders have had sex. That number was down from 54% in 1991 (around the time I started reading romance). A majority of girls are reaching adulthood as virgins.<\/p>\n<p>But then, of course, there\u2019s college.<\/p>\n<p>Even though they tend not to be virgins, most contemporary heroines are far from being very experienced. They\u2019ve often had one or two partners who didn\u2019t satisfy them. And many have abstained from sex for over a year.<\/p>\n<p><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-full wp-image-6336\" title=\"leadmeon\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/smittenbybooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/leadmeon.jpg?resize=174%2C275\" alt=\"\" width=\"174\" height=\"275\" \/>So how realistic is this? Another <a href=\"http:\/\/www.nationalsexstudy.indiana.edu\/\">national sex study<\/a>, which looked at the sexual behaviors of Americans aged 14-94, asked women and men whether they\u2019d had vaginal intercourse in the past year. 87% of women aged 25-29 said they had. The number goes down as women get older (<a href=\"http:\/\/www.nationalsexstudy.indiana.edu\/graph.html\">see this graph<\/a>). I\u2019m guessing the percentage of romance heroines in that age group who have had sex in the last year is much lower.<\/p>\n<p>Finding heroines who have extensive sexual experience is rare, but this year at least one of the contemporary novels up for a RITA award features a heroine who has quite a past. I haven\u2019t read <a href=\"http:\/\/www.victoriadahl.com\/LeadMeOnExcerpt.html\"><strong>Lead Me On <\/strong>by Victoria Dahl<\/a> yet, but I\u2019ve ordered it (along with all the other contemporary single title finalists) and can\u2019t wait to see how different the heroine is.<\/p>\n<p><strong>What do you think about virgin women in contemporary romance? Do you think they reflect real-women\u2019s sexual experience? If not, do you want them to? Comment and enter to win one of The Season&#8217;s <span style=\"color: #800080;\">10 Star Topper<\/span> books, <span style=\"color: #008000;\">THE WELCOME HOME GARDEN CLUB<\/span> by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.loriwilde.com\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><em>Lori Wilde.<\/em><\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_6338\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-6338\" style=\"width: 220px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"http:\/\/smittenbybooks.com\/april2011_contemp_1.php\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-6338\" title=\"welcomehomegardenclub\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/smittenbybooks.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/welcomehomegardenclub.jpg?resize=220%2C355\" alt=\"\" width=\"220\" height=\"355\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-6338\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">Click to read Top Pick review!<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<hr \/>\n<p><strong>Kat Latham<\/strong> has been reading romance for a couple of decades. With degrees in English lit and human rights, she loves stories that reflect the depth, humor and emotion of real life. When she\u2019s not writing contemporary romance novels, she can usually be found blogging or tweeting overly personal information. She loves meeting other readers and writers online, so <a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/katrinalatham\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">follow her on Twitter<\/a> or <a href=\"http:\/\/readericreatedhim.wordpress.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">check out her blog<\/a> and say hello!<\/p>\n<!--themify_builder_content-->\n<div id=\"themify_builder_content-6335\" data-postid=\"6335\" class=\"themify_builder_content themify_builder_content-6335 themify_builder tf_clear\">\n    <\/div>\n<!--\/themify_builder_content-->\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>How realistic is the contemporary virgin? by Kat Latham When I started reading romance *mumble mumble* years (okay, decades) ago, it was nearly impossible to [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"pagelayer_contact_templates":[],"_pagelayer_content":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[79,27,34],"tags":[216,248],"class_list":["post-6335","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-avon-books","category-giveaways","category-katrina","tag-contemporary","tag-editorial"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>A virgin...at her age? 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