I have to admit, I’m totally looking forward to reading Sex and the Single Earl. Did I also mention it’s The Season’s May Book Club Pick? Well yes, it is.
I love Vanessa’s post today. I’m definitely the one who would call the hero an alpha male and not a jerk. It’s fiction so I can say this, because it’s not true for real life, but I love a hero who many might consider a bit of a jerk if you defined jerk: arrogant, sarcastic, cocky, brooding…and sexy. 🙂 Vanessa thanks a bunch guest blogging today and the fabulous topic. I’m looking forward to reading the responses.
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Is One Reader’s Alpha Male Another One’s Jerk?
I’m so happy to be here at The Season, celebrating the release of my Regency-set historical romance, Sex And The Single Earl. With a title like that, it’s pretty obvious that my hero, Simon St. James, is going to be that special kind of guy, the Alpha male. Personally, I love the Alpha hero, the stronger the better.
The defining characteristic of the Alpha male—hero or villain—is confidence. He has a calm conviction that he can and will overcome any problem, no matter how difficult. And he’ll do it, too, with a combination of physical strength, intellectual smarts, and unwavering determination. He’s a natural leader who generally expects everyone to fall in line with his plans. If you get in his way, watch out! He’ll either go around you or over you, whichever is easier.
And therein lies the rub. Confidence can easily bleed over into arrogance, and it doesn’t take much of that to turn off a reader, especially if that arrogance is directed too forcefully at the heroine.
In Sex And The Single Earl, my hero is an uber-alpha. Simon is supremely confident and sometimes more than a little arrogant. Not that he means to be a jerk—he doesn’t. But as the head of the family, he’s used to both calling the shots and taking care of everyone else, and over time he’s grown convinced that his methods are always best. He especially feels that way about the heroine, Sophie Stanton. Simon has basically grown up with Sophie, and he’s very protective of her. But since he has known her for so long he’s not in the habit of treating her with kid gloves—especially since Sophie never has any trouble giving Simon the gears whenever she thinks he needs it. Which is often. In fact, when she was a child, she never thought twice about giving him a good kick in the shins whenever he annoyed her.
Sophie hasn’t changed much over the years, at least when it comes to Simon. Given that he’s an Alpha male, Simon doesn’t like that. He’s not above laying down the law in the hopes that Sophie will finally do what he wants her to do. And it’s exactly that kind of bull-headed determination that can come off as arrogant.
How, then, to keep the Alpha hero from being so arrogant and controlling that he comes off like a jerk? The answer lies in emphasizing his heroic qualities. The true Alpha hero, of course, has a strong need to protect those he perceives as weaker than he is, or those needing his care. The heroine usually brings out his tender qualities, even though he often resists this part of himself (a great source of conflict, by the way). He may be manipulative at times or come off as a little domineering, but it stems from his desire to protect those he loves.
Most importantly, the Alpha hero has to learn that the heroine is a strong, independent person in her own right. He has to learn to respect her. That’s certainly the case in Sex And The Single Earl. Simon would love it if Sophie did everything he wanted her to, but there’s not a hope in hell of that happening. They clash frequently over that which, by the way, often leads to interesting situations in the bedchamber. But, ultimately, Simon will learn to respect her judgment, and realize that Sophie is every bit his equal. Even more importantly, he comes to realize that he wouldn’t have it any other way.
Readers often have very different reactions to the Alpha male hero. For some, the more outrageously masculine and arrogant the hero is, the better they like him—as long as that core quality to defend and protect the heroine is always present. I’m one who believes that there is nothing sexier than a powerful, overly-confident man brought to his knees by love.
For other readers, though, that same Alpha male might come off as a jerk—too manipulative and too controlling to be attractive. It’s truly a matter of personal taste, and sometimes that line between hero and jerk can be very thin, indeed.
How about you, dear readers? Do you like that ultra-confident, slightly swaggering Alpha male, intent on bending the world to his will? Or does he give you a rash, making you long to take refuge in the arms of a Beta hero? All commenters will be entered to win an autograph copy of SEX AND THE SINGLE EARL.
I was lucky to get an early release copy last week at my bookstore. Simon may be the uber-alpha male in the story, there were many times that he brought to the point of really disliking him, but it was good to see him develope throughout the story as well as seeing Sophie become a stronger character to deal with Simon’s demanding personality.
Congrats on the new release and all the great reviews. What type of hero I want in my book depends somewhat on my mood. I generally like the alph male — what varies is the “intensity” & “attitude” that is portrayed. I agree that it’s extremely sexy to see that strong “can conquer anything/fear nothing” male brought to earth by love. That’s the best part of a good hero — the strength and honesty of his love for the heroine.
I like an Alpha hero with a swagger. Just not to much swagger. There is a fine line you don’t want to cross.
Ahhhhh, I love a strong alpha male in all my heroes….especially the tall dark and ever so brooding ones, that just assume they are lord over all, until love comes along and they realize that without it their life has had this void. What they seem to fear is the greatest gift we all have…..love.
Congratulations Vanessa, and I look forward to many more stories!
Hi Donna! Good point about the levels of intensity and attitude, and how they can vary.
runner10, it is a fine line, isn’t it?
I love an Alpha with confidence, but sensitivity and humor go a long way for me.
Congratulations on your release and wonderful reviews.
Hi Vanessa! There is a fine line, I don’t mind a little arrogance with the swagger, as long as the alpha is brought down a peg or two by the heroine, who must have intestinal fortitude to put up with such a man. True love is the ultimate weapon to bring him down, beats a dart gun! All the best for your release!
I like both kinds of heroes. It depends upon what kind of situation they are in and how they confront their challenges.
I’d say I like it when the hero and heroine are equally matched. If you’re going to have a strong alpha hero, then have a heroine who isn’t afraid to stand up to him, and let her be right sometimes. That said, I do like quieter heroes, too. Sometimes still waters run deep.
As long as it fits with the story, I’m okay with kinds of heroes.
Claudine, thanks for your great review on GoodReads – I really appreciate it!
Thanks for stopping by, Mary! Your description of the Alpha Male really describes how I think of my hero, Simon.
Armenia, I think you raise a great point about humor. That’s one of the best ways to defuse the arrogance of the Alpha hero and make him more approachable.
I LOVE a good alpha hero but there is that fine line between domineering and commanding and being a controlling jerk. But a good alpha male needs a strong woman to take him on.
Congrats on the new release! I’m really looking foward to reading it! I love it when the hero has known the heroine for years! Can’t wait!
Absolutely, Karyn! True love is the ultimate weapon against Alpha Male arrogance. I love it when a hero gradually loses control and falls off his arrogant perch and into love.
Joye, the great thing about romance is that there is so much diversity. Historical romance and paranormal romance really seem to lend themselves to the Alpha Male, while contemporary romance often has a wide range of hero types.
Aislinn, I think it’s absolutely essential that the Alpha Male be matched with a strong heroine who can stand up to him. She may not be able to do this from the get-go, but she always gets there.
Hi Jamie! Thanks for stopping by. I love a good friends to lovers story.
I was lucky enough to have the privilege to read this book early. Simon was a great alpha hero. I like an alpha with swagger.
I love Alpha Males! Le Sigh. But as someone said above, the heroine must balance out the Alpha and be strong enough for his interest to be believable. He can even be a bit of a jerk in the beginning if it is explained well and the transition is made in a believable way. I mean I adore dark brooding alpha males!
Hi Vanessa,
I enjoyed reading your views on Alpha heroes and strong independent heroines. That’s the key, I think. If the hero is strong and the heroine is fragile, there’s not enough intensity to make the hero realize that he loves her. And… we all want a happy ending with the hero and heroine truly in love with each other.
That’s a problem in real life relationships. It’s rare for both people to be at the same level at the same time. A psychologist I knew once said that if that happened, the couple would want to be in bed all the time, instead of going to work, doing the dishes /laundry, etc. and, when daily living started to break down, the couple would separate to some degree anyway.
You’re a new writer for me, but I’m looking forward to getting your book and reading it. It sounds super!
Elaine C.
p.s. This blog has very interesting comments on it today. I’ll keep checking back to read future ones.
My favorite part of a romance is the clash between a strong, alpha hero and a strong, intelligent heroine – the operative word being strong. The battle of the sexes with lots of heat and an interesting setting has the potential to be a great read!
Congratulations, Vanessa! SEX AND THE SINGLE EARL sounds like a delicious book and I’ll be sure to be on the lookout for it.
Thank you, Samantha! That’s really nice of you to say that about Simon. He can be a real tough guy sometimes, which isn’t everybody’s cup of tea.
Hi Danielle! Yes, we must see the hero’s growth through the book – he can’t remain an arrogant jerk.
Hi Elaine! What an interesting comment from that psychologist. Yes, we do have to see the attraction between the h/h develop into something more than sexual chemistry. One of the things that made it a bit easier for me as a writer with this book was that Sophie and Simon knew each other. They had a history together and an understanding of each other’s behavior. In fact, when Simon started acting in a manner that Sophie wasn’t used to, she knew that something was wrong.
Laurie, thanks for stopping by! It’s all about the conflict, right? That’s one of the things I like about Alpha heroes. No wishy-washiness.
My most favorite type of hero is the ultra confident alpha.
Thanks for the contest and interview!
No betas for me, Vanessa! I do NOT want to say I’ve got more balls than my man!!
BUT there is a difference between confidence and over-confidence in a man. Sometimes a hero might seem to be a jerk when the heroine first meets him. The hero is confident of himself and what he does for a living, but his weakness is his love for the heroine, which he must come to terms with.
At the same time, the assertive heroine must grow to assimilate the two characteristics of love and confidence—in other words, that these two qualities in a man don’t conflict with each t other, because she is able to grow beyond her own biases of being strongly independent and realizing HER love for the hero.
Otherwise, she comes across as a bitch.
Likewise, the overly-confident guy is the ass who is too engrossed in himself to ever fully appreciate or love the heroine for who she is.
Vanessa, Congratulations on the release of your book and having it picked for the Book of the Month.
I’ve not read you before but can tell I would like your writing, just from this blog post, which, IMO, is one to print out and keep. I also enjoyed the discussion from other people. Thanks for making me think.
Julie
I like the alpha male .great question
Acornn, thanks for stopping by!
Julie, you made me do a spit-take of my coffee!! Great analysis, and I especially like what you have to say about the heroine. She must grow into self-confidence and love, too. You know, that would be a great topic for a blog post – the confident rather than the bitchy heroine.
Thanks, peggy! Hope you’re enjoying the discussion.
Hi Vanessa! Congratulations on your new release “Sex and the Single Earl” and on all the great reviews. I like both the alpha and the beta heros, but I do have to say the alpha is my favorite as long as he’s not to much of a jerk. There is just something about watching a big strong alpha male falling in love with his heroine and doing anything in his power to prove it.
Hi, Vanessa! Congratulations on the release of your book and the great reviews! You are a new author for me, but you’ve got my attention and determination in looking for your books. I can hardly wait to read one.
I like to read about alpha males who are covered with a deep shell because of past hurts, but have confidence, humor, and a protective quality. Of course, the heroine has to be feisty and be able to keep up with him. It’s especially nice when there is some humor involved. I also like friends to lovers books. That was how my husband of 36 years and I started out. It took us over 6 months to realize that we had fallen in love with each other.
I absolutely love Alpha heroes with a swagger. Especially those who are a bit cynical and those who have been hurt before. I find that Alpha heroes are those who fall deeply in love with their heroine and I absolutely love seeing them fall.
However, I would hate to have the Alpha hero be paired with a docile heroine. The heroine should always have a streak of independence and confidence. The perfect match for the Alpha hero. No clinging vines for me or the Alpha hero would really seem like an ass when he dominates the clinging vine. Arrghh!
I love alpha males. Sex and the Single Earl sounds great. 🙂
I sort of want the in-between. I like the man who has the alpha rakish qualities, but i also like my guys to be a bit beta. Guys who are control who a heroine can see, talk to, or go drives me insane. They make me want to bring a bat to their heads. I’m pretty much with “Zeee” on everything she says though. ^^
Hi Vanessa!
Can’t wait to read about your hot alpha male and the sparing he does with your feisty heroine! For me the key to a great hero is related to what you said in your post, that love brings him to his knees–that the heroine exposes his vulnerabilites and strips away all his defenses–and the same thing happens to her. Congrats on your success–sounds like a great read!
Hi Amber! It’s always fun to watch the Alpha hero get increasingly desperate as he tries to prove his love to the doubting heroine.
Hi Cathy! What a great story about you and your husband. Sounds like you got your HEA!
Zeee, I think you’re bang-on. Clinging vines and Alpha heroes don’t ususally work.
Hi Vanessa! A 100% alpha male works for me! Looking forward to reading SaTSE!
I’m one of the ones who say the more alpha, the better. 😡 I tend to find some great heroines in those stories!
Thanks for stopping by, Crystal!
Melissa, I like a story where the hero tries to control the heroine and fails miserably. His heart is usually in the right place, but he has to learn that he needs to trust the heroine rather than keep her wrapped up in cotton batting.
Vanessa, congratulations on your new book! I can’t wait to read it! I love Alpha males, and the more domineering the better! As long as he is also protective of his heroine and has a sense of humor, and incredibly handsome too! No bad tempered boors please. He has to be strong but always gentle, loving, and listens to her point of view! There’s so much that goes into making sure the Alpha doesn’t cross the line into a brute! I admire how a great author can keep that balance in her Alphas.
Thanks for writing this book, and I hope I win a copy !
First, congratulations on the release of your book. The review that preceded this post was most positive.
I like Alpha males, but like you said, they walk a fine line. I prefer to think of them in term of capable, self-
confident, honorable, strong, and doing what he feels if best and right. Pushy, mean, and obnoxious do not appear on that list anywhere and are automatic disqualifiers. Arrogance is OK if it is come by honestly – of course you will do what he wants, it is for the best and he, being the male, knows and wants what is best for you. Did I mention clueless can also be a factor. He is basically a really nice guy. Even his high-handed actions are not done with a mean or nasty intent. He is human and not perfect. I expect him to loose his temper – any good heroine worth her salt will make sure of that – but he will not hold a grudge against her.
In spite of his flaws and because of his strengths, he is more than worth taking as he is. Jerks on the other hand aren’t worth the trouble.
Vanessa, Best of luck with the release of this book. I look forward to reading it and will be looking forward to many more by you.
Hi Vanessa,
Love what I’m hearing about Sex And The Single Earl. It’s on my TRL. I wish you much success and Congrats on the release.
I love an Alpha male, he can even have a little arrogance as long as he has a sense of humor and knows when not to take himself to seriously. But sensitivity and compassion go a long way along with passion.
Carol L.
Lucky4750@aol.com
I like both type of heros, depends on the mood I am in at the time I am reading! Congrats on your new release, sounds like a great read!
Hi Heather! As you say, it can be a real balancing act.
librarypat, I think you identify one of the key elements of the alpha hero – he is basically a really nice guy. He usually does things because he thinks it’s best for everybody. That particular brand of arrogance, of course, will lead to all kinds of trouble with the heroine!
Quilt Lady, it’s nice to have variety, isn’t it? I just read a great book by Linnea Sinclair that featured a very appealing Beta hero. He was no less heroic for having a different way of resolving conflict.
Hi Vanessa,
Love the blog again today. Lots of great thinking points made. I like a hero to have attitude, swagger and all the rest that goes with alpha status. It’s always been said ‘the bigger they are, the harder they fall’ and that is so true in romance novels. I love it when a big, tall, strapping alpha hero is brought to his knees by a teeny tiny alpha heroine! And doesn’t even see it coming!
Congrats again on the release of your book. I don’t have my copy yet, but I will soon. Can’t wait!
I like a confident alpha, but he needs to have a sense of humor and be gentle.
I agree, Vanessa, about the blog topic. Readers aren’t just reading for the hunky hero. They want to escape—to BE the heroine. In order to be the heroine, you must be able to identify with her, and AS her to fall in love with the hero. Thus, the hero must be a man, larger than life–but still a man, whom she can fall in love with.
Hi Karen! I love the image of the big strapping alpha brought to his knees by the tiny heroine. That’s the real fun of writing them.
Estella, I do think there has to be that underlying core of gentleness. If often manifests itself as an uber-protective instinct that can seem very controlling. It’s tricky. We love the Alpha male but are often uncomfortable with some characteristics of the breed.
Good way to put it, Julie. Larger than life, but still a man you can fall in love with.
I love an alpha male as I find him in historical romances. In those he is arrogant, confident and swaggering with good reason, BUT he is or becomes smart enough to know when to draw the line before reaching the outskirts of jerkdom. In real life they VERY SELDOM do. In fact, in real life they sometimes have all of these qualities for no good reason AND they don’t just cross the line into jerkdom, the take the SST and hit the turbo boost!
The key to making me like your alpha hero is to have a female who can handle him and an alpha male that eventually comes to admire her ability to do so.
I think I’m in between. Sometimes I like it but sometimes I don’t..i guess it depends on the situation and the way the hero is acting.
Hi, Vanessa. I’m looking forward to SATSE! (I will buy it if I don’t win it!)
I think I would like a hero that is a little bit Alpha and a little bit Beta. Sometimes the Beta males have stillwaters that run deep and are just as sexy as the Alphas. Kind of a pat answer, but I don’t like over-the-top Alphas.
Hi Louisa! The Alpha hero definitely needs a strong heroine to make him see the error of his ways.
Marjana, I think the Alpha hero can sometimes push our buttons – and not in a good way! That’s why he needs that strong heroine.
Hi, Deb! I’ve read lots of sexy Beta male heroes. I especially like the intellectual or scientific types, who think their way out of a bad situation.
I love the Alpha hero – but I also love when he meets his match in a strong, confident heroine.
I’m with you all the way, Barbara!
Congrats on the release, Vanessa! I have to say, I’ve read a number of books when at the beginning I thought, I’m not going to like him. Of course, that’s when I end up loving the hero. But even if the beginning I wouldn’t call him a jerk, it’s more, geez he’s mean or super arrogant. But to me those are the best heroes because I know they will have a long and hard fall. At the end, you know they’ll be putty in the heroine’s hands. 🙂
Hi Bev! Thanks for having me on The Season – it’s been a great discussion. And from your comments, I think you’re going to love Simon! He has quite the fall.
Vanessa, congratulations on the release of SEX AND THE SINGLE EARL. I think stories with alpha males and the strong, independent heroines pitted against them are fabulous because they provide so much conflict and sexual tension. SATSE sounds just like such a story. I’ll definitely add it to my TBR list.
Angela
I don’t like constantly overbearing, arrogant people: men or women. If a person can’t bend once in a while and admit that he might not always be right (even if he doesn’t verbalize the admission), I can’t love him. No one is right all the time.
But then there are the strong people who can own up to a mistake just by showing a change of heart. And real Alpha males can.
I’m definitely for the alpha male, I think most of their swagger is just for show and they are good, caring men. I’ll be buying this one!
Angela, thanks for stopping by – there’s quiet a bit of conflict and sexual tension between Sophie and Simon, I can assure you!
Ranurgis, one the keys to the real Alpha male is that he can admit he’s wrong, and own up to his mistakes. Thanks for stopping by!
Sheila, thank you so much for your support!
I absolutely LOVE the ultra-confident, slightly swaggering Alpha male, intent on bending the world to his will type. Probably because in real life I go for the type B personality. Mainly because I myself am a alpha female.. at times Ok, most times. LOL This book seems unbelievable though. I am dying to pick it up.
Hi Vanessa!
It’s so nice to see you here at The Season! 🙂
I am one who loves alpha males! You wrote in your post “I’m one who believes that there is nothing sexier than a powerful, overly-confident man brought to his knees by love.” That’s exactly how I think! And it’s alot of fun when the heroine has some backbone and the alpha-hero doesn’t have it all easy and has to work to win the heroine!
Thanks for stopping by Vanessa, your book looks great and what a sexy cover!
I love a confident Alpha male but arrogance is something I’m not fond of. There’s nothing wrong with a man knowing who he is and what he’s capable of. I like him to be in control. Having said that I also love a heroine that is strong enough to take him on at times when needed & make him fall in love. I guess some equality is required.
I like the ultra-confident, slightly swaggering Alpha male, intent on bending the world to his will as long as the heroine can meet him toe-to-toe!
I adore ultra-confident, slightly swaggering Alpha males! They are the reason I read romance novels. 🙂